We all fumble …
We are born fumblers. No-one is born
knowing how to do anything other than breathe and dirty their diaper. We learn
everything else. We learn to walk – unsteadily at first. We learn to talk –
unsteadily at first. We learn to play, to ride a bike, to cook food, to write,
to sing, to design – all of these things and more – but all, unsteadily at
first. Why are we so hard on ourselves? People are, in my experience, very hard
on themselves. This is ‘throw-back’ behavior – I think it is a left-over behavior
from the days when we lived in small tribes. If we demonstrated to the tribe
that we couldn’t hunt well or provide well or be of benefit to the tribe in
some way – then we lost standing in the tribe – and that, could mean starvation
or even death. Those who were quickly able to demonstrate their capabilities
were afforded prestige in the tribe – those who couldn’t – were afforded less
prestige. And for much of our history, prestige amongst our peers mean’t an
increased chance of survival (better mates, a larger share of food, etc). But
the world we live in now is very different; our survival isn’t as strongly
connected to how other people see us. We can, to a large degree, survive well
without the approval of our peer group. When we are learning new things – we can
afford to fail, and fail grandly – the price is no longer what it once was. So
take a chance – try that new technique – turn left when you normally would have
turned right – experiment – the price-tag is usually affordable.
JBW
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