Being THIS ... but wanting THAT ...

Being THIS … but wanting to be THAT … can be both a good thing and a bad thing. Wanting to be something other than what we are can cause stress and underpin bad behaviour - it can lead to jealousy and can change people for the worse - I’ve seen it happen; and I’ve seen it happen with otherwise excellent people. But …
Wanting to be something other than what we are can also drive us positively toward our goals; it can trigger changes that lead us toward better versions of ourselves. It can drive us to train harder and with more focus, to improve and to inch our way toward a better life for ourselves and for our families.
We all want to improve our situations. It’s a natural progression from the survival-state. But it is worthwhile asking sometimes - at what cost? And to what end? Life is short - we all want to get it as RIGHT as we can … but as I have said before, it’s who we become on the journey to our goals - that ultimately defines who we are and how happy we can be. Ultimately, history, the community (as well as friends and family) will judge each of us. I like to think that we can all bring something to the table ... we all have the potential to leave the world a better place for our having lived in it. This is a simple but worthy cause. JBW


JiuJiu said…
I've personally grappled with this notion. I come from a non-athletic background (scifi, gaming, couch potato, nerd), I am 5'4" (163 cm) and I was 34 years old and 203 lbs (92 kg) when I started BJJ. I was in class with these phenomenal 23 year-old athletes - very low body fat, had been doing everything athletic their entire life. I was huffing and puffing just coming into class.

I'm now at 160 lbs (72.5 kg), and I am closer to my partners, but still nowhere near.

I have to balance between realistic and settling. Sometimes I don't know the difference. Am I being realistic that I'll never be able to do XYZ? Or am I settling, and if I set the goal, could I exceed my expectations?

It's a really weird balance, and I definitely haven't figured it out.

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